(In The Air Tonight - Phil Collins)
Ask someone, anyone, if they know what Roller Derby is, and most folks will say something about a bunch of girls on roller skates, but most people won't be able to tell you anything more than that. This is usually for one of two reasons:
1. Roller Derby isn't quite main-stream enough to occupy a spot in that part of our brains reserved for ubiquitous football or baseball knowledge.
2. They absolutely know what Roller Derby is, but swear that they don't understand ANYTHING about the seemingly convoluted system of play.
In fairness, I AM familiar with the rules associated with Roller Derby, and they are hysterically confusing. The real question is, 'Is it worth learning?'
THE SHORT VERSION:
YES! HOLY CRAP, YES!
THE LONG VERSION:
I was torn about writing this review. The fact of the matter is that, yes, Roller Derby isn't that wide-spread of a thing just yet, but I also firmly believe that this gives the sport a more wholesome, personal feel, and that's lacking in most sporting events today. The love of the game, of the moment, is absent from even most college sports. Roller Derby may be one of the last bastions of this sort of thing, and while I want to shout from the rooftops about what I took part in tonight, part of me wants it to stay a ... secret. In the end, I couldn't see myself not telling anyone about such a spectacular evening.
What, then, is Roller Derby? I'm not sure I can properly describe it, but I'll give it a try, and then run to YouTube for assistance.
Two teams of 5 women on roller skates travel in a pack around an oval track. Each team has a designated person who starts at the rear of the pack and attempts to skate THROUGH the pack and get out ahead of it. This person is referred to as a Jammer and is designated by a giant star on their helmet. No hands can be used, and the people in the pack can only use their bodies to stop the scorers, no actual hand contact. For each member of the opposing team that a Jammer passes and STAYS past, a point is gained. If the Jammer gets out in front of the Pack, she must lap the pack and attempt to get through them again in order to score more points. Each scoring session lasts for two minutes and is referred to as a Jam. (Not a Jammer.) Each time a new Jam is started, new Jammers are picked to try and score points for each team.
And don't even get me started on Pivots, Lead Jammers, strategic arm flapping, Power Jams or the consequences of failing to properly maintain the pack.
"But Steve," you cry, "That doesn't really sound complicated at all. And if we're honest, it doesn't sound that exciting, either."
First, let me assure you that my description was crude and lacking almost completely in the justice that is due this sport. Second, it doesn't sound that exciting because you're reading about it here, in the blog of a man who has, at best, a mediocre grasp on the english language.
Even this video, helpful as it is, does absolutely nothing to convey just how much of a contact sport this is, and just how incredible the skaters have to be to make it through a properly maintained pack. And make no mistake, this is absolutely a contact sport. One that is played by women.
Before you ask, any woman that's ever actually played a legitimate contact sport knows exactly what I'm on about. See, all things considered, men are pretty decent to one another when we play our sports. Women?
Yeah, they just cultivate wrath on the field.
So, let's recap:
It's a sport that's fun to watch, is kid-friendly, is niche enough that you can get GREAT seats, even if you arrive at the start of the match, the fan-base is spectacular and still hometown humble, and the athletes are some of the most hard-working, hard-playing, entertaining sports stars that have ever willingly shed sweat and blood on a field. Check out the KC Roller Warriors online, find a match to get to, and get to it.
The Pack is waiting.
A great documentary about the rise of the sport and some of the challenges they face. I should have a screening.
http://www.derbybabythefilm.com/
Posted by: Michael J Zupon | 05/03/2015 at 12:08 AM
my dental hygienist is a former Roller Warrior, as is one of my co-workers. The wife of one of Roy's other students was in a different local derby league - http://www.deadgirlderby.com/
Posted by: J Mike Reed Jr | 05/03/2015 at 01:35 AM